No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
