Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize