been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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