I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
