Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
