Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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