she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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