Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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