I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
