Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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