Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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