Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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