I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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