quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
