You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
