I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
