i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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