this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
