Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
