We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
