I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
