it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
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