even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
