You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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