with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
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at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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