wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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