I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize