I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Someone shattered a urinal.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
