That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
