Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
how do flat chested girls get laid?
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
i think im in europe. pls send help
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
