You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
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