I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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