His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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