was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
My ass is underappreciated
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
