I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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