Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
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i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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