Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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