Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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