just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
