Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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