They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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