Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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