I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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