How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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