im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
