She's JV to your varsity
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
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