so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
