shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
