dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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