brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Randomize
